First, let me say: COVID has affected us all financially. My heart goes out to everyone who has been struggling and is still struggling. Everything has been terrible this past year. To add financial stress on top of that is the absolute worst. That being said, my conservative-self has been freaking out as millions of borrowed dollars has been flowing out of the US government like we haven’t a care in the world. Sometimes, I go and look at just how much debt we the people are in and my brain absolutely cannot comprehend it. But since I know our Conservative Bae Dr. Rand Paul is busy fighting the good fight of saving money in the government, including trying to keep dead people from getting stimulus checks, I will take the stimulus checks and do my good American duty of stimulating the economy. Below are some of the things I’ll be putting my money towards and I invite y’all to do the same.

1) Future Female Leaders merch

Bypass AOC’s absolutely ridiculously tone deaf $60 “Tax the Rich” sweatshirt in favor of one of Future Female Leader’s own sweatshirts like this one that’s currently sitting in my cart. All proceeds from purchases directly support FFL’s efforts to build and empower the next generation of conservative women so it’s win-win!

2) A Great Book

Snag a copy of Conservative Forever Bae Dr. Rand Paul’s book “A Case Against Socialism.” Snuggle up and let that blue eyed Kentucky babe remind you why socialism has forever been a bad idea.

3) White Claws

Get in on the new White Claws. Soon the geniuses over at our favorite seltzer company will be blessing us with new flavors, including blackberry and strawberry and I honestly cant hand over my money fast enough. (PS: we’re also getting 18 and 24 packs, be still my heart)

4) A Gun

Buy a gun. Our 2A rights are under attack, period. Check your state laws, get your permit and license then buy yourself a gun and ammo. Find a gun range or gun shop that will teach you how to shoot, clean and store your gun properly. As our founding father George Washington (probably) once said, “Stay strapped or get clapped.”

5) A Great Movie or Soundtrack

Download “The Greatest Showman” soundtrack and give yourself a massive serotine boost from singing these songs at the top of your lungs. This soundtrack is nothing but bangers. If you’re not doing the dramatic side-to-side walk and jumping on beat to “This is Me” you aren’t doing it right. I have the dramatic, sweeping arm movements down from “Never Enough” so that even my cat is impressed when I’m sitting on the couch, entertaining him. Zac Efron and I have rewritten the stars more times than I can count and I am sure the people that live in the apartment beneath me are sick of me knee-slapping my way aggressively through “From Now On.” Do yourself a favor, get the soundtrack and unleash your inner song bird. Serotonin = Boosted.

Hannah Brokaw lives in a red state and votes red. She enjoys true crime TV shows, long naps and tacos. Please bother her via Twitter where she has a lot of thoughts.

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